October 24, 2006

Calling for a paintball moratorium

What is it with college football wide receivers and paintball this year? You would think that playing paintball would be written in to their scholarships as a forbidden activity, but it isn't.

Today we hear the second paintball related incident to affect player eligibility, and this one is much more violent than accidental.

The University of Louisville suspends two backup WRs after they allegedly popped a woman as she left a local haunted house attraction. Chris Vaughn and the appropriately named Scott Long will miss the Big Big East game next Thursday versus West Virginia.

Earlier this season, Purdue WR Selwyn Lymon, one of the biggest recruits to ever come to Lafayette, removes his goggles after a friendly game then gets hit in the eye. May not have been that big of a story had he not just tortured Notre Dame for over 200 yards and an 83-yard TD.

Seriously, this was cool when I was in college in the early Nineties. Put the popgun back in the closet by the in-line skates, the cowboy boots for line-dancing and the old Bowflex.

Perhaps in the 2000's culture, paintball allows the weekend warriors in us to empathize with our brothers and sisters engaged in battle around the globe - but perhaps I give the paintball enthusiasts too much credit. More than likely they aggressively shoot others to a) act out their Halo fantasies in real life, or b) make up for their passive allowance of bosses/wives/girlfriends to control their happiness.


Anonymous said...

first off, i do not appreciate the attacks your are making against my sport. The actions carried out are done by the individual and you should not go and push their actions against the global paintball community. To say that every one who plays paintball is just trying to get their fill of bloodlust for the week is over completely uncalled for. To say that we're merely trying to live our halo fantasies is like saying that all lacrosse players beat up strippers, which is wrong because i am also a lacrosse player.

in the future please keep an personal grudge against my sport out of your writing

Anonymous said...

yea, dicknuts, way to stereotype you faggoty ass kfc-eating nigger